The NICU (week 1)

Aidan's first week in the NICU was the beginning of an incredibly hard time in all of our lives. After having gone through all of the craziness of his birth I was a complete mess. I had to stay in the hospital one day and then Dr. Afshar discharged me so that I could go see my baby. Rich and I drove straight from the hospital to the NICU. At that time we were actually living in Branson with plans to move to Springfield in a few weeks. Thank goodness my sister had just moved to Springfield so we were able to stay with her for about a week and then we decided we needed to go ahead and move so that we could have our own place and we could be close to Aidan. Just 2 days after Aidan was born I was up and about, walking through the St. John's hospital to go see my little boy. I guess there is a funny side to
what was happening to me. I still had a pooch and I was walking funny so people thought I was pregnant. The guy that gave us a ride from the parking lot to the front door of the hospital said to me, "Well you look like you're due any day now!" I just smiled at him and said, "Actually I already had him." He was really embarrassed and didn't say a word after that. Then in the elevator a lady patted Rich on his back and said "Congratulations!". I didn't even bother trying to explain.
When we finally got to the NICU it was a bitter-sweet moment. I was so happy to be with Aidan but it was so hard to see him in his condition. He was on a ventilator but the next day he was taken off of it. In these pictures he is under an oxygen hood. I can't say that the first week was the hardest because our entire time there was hard but it was painful not knowing what to do. I felt so helpless. I couldn't help but think that I am his mother and it is my responsibility to take care of him and yet I couldn't even really touch him! My heart ached. Aidan had been intubated and extubated about 3 times in his 1st week of life. They didn't know what the problem was and thought that because when he was on the ventilator he was on room air he would be fine if he was extubated. I remember the second time he was reintubate Rich and I were on our way to church and we got a call from the hospital and they told us that he had to go back on the ventilator and that they found blood in his stomach. I was so scared and completely broke down. Rich and I said a prayer in the car and both felt so strongly that we needed to go to sacrament meeting. Prayers were said for Aidan and the sacrament hymns seemed to be chosen especially for us. We both felt our Heavenly Father's love for us and for Aidan so strongly. It was a very special time. We went to see Aidan right after church. That was Aidan's first week. What a beautiful blessing he is in our lives. I love him more than anything.